Nobody Knows What I Feel

Actually I wrote this note on the 17th of August (If I'm not mistaken). Nobody knows what I feel. It began by this week, I stay in my home not just laying and loittering or hibernating. I help my mother to handle the household activities. I do the shopping in the market every market day. I also help her to clean the house, to wash and to cook. Yes, we don’t have anyone to help us (rewang ing Javanese). I’m a little bit irritated when someone looked down on me (or maybe just my feeling) when I told *** that I was sick. I was sick on Monday, I don’t want it because it means that I couldn’t help my mom. I couldn’t do no anything, I just lay on my bed and doing nothing. My mom told me to break my fasting but I didn’t want. Alhamdulillah, I was better on the next day but still I just did the easy thing to help.  At night I had a message to confirm something but I told *** the truth and the worst thing was *** looked like that *** didn’t believe in me. I was so dissapointed I wanted to tell *** that “hey, who wants to be sick? I never want to be sick coz because of that sick  I couldn’t do anything”. I know that now I am easier to be sick, I never want this. I also don’t know why. I want to be healthy so that I keep my want to have a break of the organization so that I can do the check up, and still there is a bad words about me (so sad :( ).   

Something Suspicious in My Eyes

            I had a problem with my eyes. Both of my eyes are easy to feel in burn and the side effects are I get an agony effect in my eyes and the back of my head.  Then I also feel my head is very heavy, so it actually disturbs me from doing my activities, finishing my job. A couple days ago I got something suspicious in my eyes. Around my pupils area there are bumps. Today I found something that in my right eye’s pupil there is a crack, I am so afraid that it means “something”. I hope I’ll be OK, maybe on Monday I’ll check my eyes also my respiration organ. I hope everything is alriight so that I can study better. Amiiin

My First Heeled Sandals

           Hi, today I want to share about what I got. Actually I got my first heeled sandals *iyeyy*. As you know that I am not such a kind of girly girl but also not such a kind of boyish girl (because my boyish era had been over almost for five years). I’ll tell you the chronology. My family and I were going to the supermarket to buy clothes for my first brother. There my mother and I also looking for sandals (Actually because I do not have any appropriate sandals anymore) then I saw some sandals, minute by minute went by but I still couldn’t find any because I got a problem of choosing number for my small feet. After that I try to find more and then *voila* my mom got a pair, they are cute enough(just like me J)and the best part was they are fit to my feet. Finally I got my first heeled sandals *iyeeeeeyyy* but at first I used those sandals I was just like a walking robot haha. My mom said finally I became a girl hohoho. 

My Confusion

I know that noone will read my blog so that I feel so blesses here. This is my confusion. Call me egoist this time, I don’t care and I think I’ll never care anymore. I confuse because this week is a very rush week. I was so shocked when I got a message that I have to come to Semarang by the end of this week. What made me confuse is because there will be nobody taking care of my little bros and also my home. Fyi, both of my mother and my father will have an accreditation from tomorrow until the end of this week. Do you know how I feel? It is so complicated. My mom gives me the responsible for taking care of the house and my little brother. So yesterday I asked my lecturer for a permission and he said yes *Alhamdulillah*. So I can do my job to take care of my house and my bros because both of my parents are having accreditation since 18th until 20th of August.